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Tattle: With no direction home, like a Rolling Stoned
By ED WEINER
Philadelphia Daily News
weinere@phillynews.com
Jul 30, 2008
MRS. RON WOOD - wife of 23 years to the guitarist for the World's Greatest Rock 'n' Roll Band Eligible for Seniors Benefits - was sitting alone in their posh place in London recently, wondering where her wandering boy might be. Then, according to Hellomagazine.com, she found out.
He had been decamped for 10 days at their posh country manse in County Kildare, Ireland.
OK, so far.
He was waitin' on a friend.
Uh-oh. Can you see it coming?
A teenage cocktail waitress named Ekaterina Ivanova .
No sympathy for this little devil.
According to Hello, "The 61-year-old, who has a history of alcoholism, formed a bond with the Russian teen after meeting her at a bar in Soho in April. Since then the musician, who's a keen artist, is believed to have been using the blonde waitress as a model for his work."
Etchings?
Then, after a series of what Hello calls "emotional phone calls," Wood hopped a jet to get back home, to patch things up with long-suffering Jo , his wife.
Who must have been waiting with an elephant gun, because before the pixels were dry on that Hello story, the news came across the Associated Press wire: "Rolling Stones guitarist Ronnie Wood has entered rehab for a drinking problem, his spokeswoman said."
We're assuming the spokeswoman was not named Ekaterina Ivanova.
No word on how long he'll be in the place, but when he comes out, he not only better be wearing his Kevlar anti-divorce vest, but he better do a Kobe , and no bauble could be too big.
On the floor, in the round
When the dust had cleared - it's not foggy in London anymore, but, boy, that dust! - and all the votes were tallied, BBC Radio listeners had named as the Greatest Dance Record of All Time, Michael Jackson 's "Billie Jean."
(And for all those still wondering, the kid is not his son. Could be his playmate, though.)
Donna Summers ' 1977 hit "I Feel Love" was No. 2, followed by the unbelievably danceable, unbelievably rhythmic, arguably musical and scansion-resistant "Get Up (I Feel Like Being a) Sex Machine," by James Brown .
For those wanting to fill out their party tapes or go iTunes-diving, the remaining seven on the Brit hit list were: "Strings Of Life," Rhythim Is Rhythim; "Where Love Lives," Alison Limerick ; "Keep On Movin'," Soul II Soul; "Can You Feel It," Fingers Inc.; "Big Fun," Inner City; "Theme From S'Express," S'Express; and "Key to My Happiness," The Charades.
_ Speaking of James Brown, you might still have time to get up to New York today for Christie's auction of many of the personal effects of the Hardest-Working Man in Show Business. (Brown died on Christmas 2006.)
There'll be his capes, of course (see, we knew he was a superhero), but some of the other stuff is odd and interesting: hair-care products (and let's not kid ourselves - he used plenty); his 1986 Grammy for "Living in America"; photos and handwritten notes, and, according to a McClatchy report, "the inmate inventory sheet listing the clothing and accessories that were taken when Brown went to prison in 1989 for aggravated assault and failure to stop for police."
But if we had the dough, we'd spring for the jumpsuit he wore in 1974 when he performed before the Muhammad Ali - George Foreman "Rumble in the Jungle" in Zaire. That's expected to fetch $5,000. The whole schmear is predicted to bring in around $2 million. Too bad - the guy could have used it when he was alive. Guess he never heard of eBay.
Unforgettable . . . but ill
Sad news on the health front for Grammy-winner Natalie Cole . In a routine medical examination, she was diagnosed as having hepatitis C, a liver disease caused by exposure to HCV-infected blood, and which can lead to cirrhosis and even liver cancer. A statement from her publicist said that the origin of the disease probably stems from her use of drugs years ago.
Doctors are hopeful, though: Her physician at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in Los Angeles, Dr. Graham Woolf , said that Cole, 58, has had a "terrific response to her medication and is now virus-negative. This gives her an increased chance of cure." Right now, though, she's fighting the exhausting side effects of the medication she's taking.
Tattbits
_ In another attempt at committing
career suicide, sometime-comedian Andy Dick was arrested in Murietta, Calif., for investigation of drug use and sexual battery. According to reports, Dick, 42, was arrested early yesterday in the parking lot of a bar, and was being held on $5,000 bail. This was, as they say, not his first brush with the law. In 1999, Dick was arrested for possession of cocaine and marijuana after driving his car into a telephone pole in Hollywood. And last year, he was cited in Columbus, Ohio, for urinating in public.
Sometimes, some people just live up to their names.
_ In passing: Farewells to Charles Joffe and Les Crane . Joffe, 78, was highly instrumental in Woody Allen 's career; with partner Jack Rollins, he urged Allen, then just a writer, to perform his own material, and then went on to produce most of Allen's films. He's in the credits as co-executive producer of Allen's upcoming film, "Vicky Cristina Barcelona," starring Penelope Cruz . It's the 42nd Joffe-Allen project.
And Crane, 74, was an electrifying late-night host, whose short-lived ABC show was the first to take on Johnny Carson after he took over "The Tonight Show." Crane was cocky and brash, but what sticks in memory is his wielding of a shotgun mike that he would whip around and aim at audience members participating in that night's discussion. It was a compelling prop, the show was intriguing, but ABC pulled the plug on it in short order. Crane also won a best-spoken-word Grammy for his 1971 recording of "Desiderata" (you had to be there), and was lucky enough to have been married to Tina Louise . But that shotgun mike . . . somebody should resurrect it. *
Daily News wire services contributed to this report.
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